writer activist sadomasochist

A protest march that worked

Thu, 08 May 2008 14:15:14 GMT

I was driving out of Manhattan yesterday after picking up 2 sick foster cats from PetCo at Union Square. Yes, that's how I spend too much of my time. About two blocks from the Midtown Tunnel, I heard on the radio that people were protesting last month's verdict on the shooting of Sean Bell (the unarmed black man who was shot by three police officers, of which two of them were black). The protesters had just blocked the onramp to the Queensborough Bridge, shutting down traffic. As I crossed 2nd Avenue on 36th Street, I saw a dozen police officers standing there staring south.

Down 2nd Ave, a block away, a crowd of people were marching towards me. It looked like at least a hundred people spilling off the sidewalk into the avenue. They were carrying white signs without the sticks, because that's illegal in NYC. I zipped into the tunnel just as they were arriving to shut down traffic behind me coming in from 36th Street.

I have to say my first feeling was relief. I really didn't want to get blocked from getting out of Manhattan during rush hour. I had to get these cats to the vet, go pick up my thyroid prescription, blah, blah, blah. I'm sure the drivers who got blocked behind me felt the same way – "Why inconvenience me? I had nothing to do with the Sean Bell verdict."

But as I drove home, I realized it was a really smart move. How many protests have I attended that got NO attention whatsoever from the media or officials? I remember the huge peace march near the United Nations that Kel and I went to prior to the US invasion of Iraq. There were at least 100,000 people. Block after block of 1st Avenue was filled with protesters and late arrivals were being routed up to the 60's to get onto 1st Ave. But we were orderly and didn't block cross streets or the bridges and tunnels.

Afterwards I had to search to find the briefest mention of the enormous protest. Only local rags in NYC carried it. And the number of people was grossly underestimated by the media and police. CNN showed a few stragglers, completely misrepresenting the scope of the march. It sucked in every way possible that our message was blocked by those in power.

But I woke up this morning and found that under a thousand protesters had done such a good job in shutting down the rush-hour commute that it's a top news story today. Al Sharpton got arrested. I'm not a big fan of his, but whoever thought up this idea for a protest – a peaceful pray-in at the onramps of bridges and tunnels – is brilliant in my book.

What do you want to bet that the people who were blocked from leaving Manhattan don't feel the same?

Hanging in suspense

Tue, 11 Mar 2008 16:38:52 GMT

I went to SINSations in Leather in Chicago last weekend with Kel, then came home and promptly got so sick I've been in bed ever since. I'm still feeling punky, but there was one thing I saw at the event that I keep thinking about. Actually, I saw LOTS of wild and wonderful things - Lovely Rita and Femcar top the list!

But this one was new to me. Self-suspension bondage. Have you ever seen it?

Kel and I wandered back to the play space late on Saturday when it was nearly empty. There was one woman there alone – with Lochai
and another guy practicing body harnesses on Kate and her friend nearby. This lone woman proceeded to tie herself up and suspend herself, stretching up to her toes to get the rope through the hoop. At one point she dragged a chair over with her foot to stand on it. She ended up hanging upside-down with one foot bound to her butt. It was graceful, like a silent ballet. And she did it really fast. Wow! Kel and I were mesmerized, and the remaining people in the ballroom ended up gathering with us to watch.

You can see some of Lochai's suspension photos here.

I seem to be going from event to event lately. Tomorrow, Wednesday evening, I'll be at GMSMA's Forum on Erotic Fiction at the Center (13th Street and 7th Ave in NYC). I'll be reading from one of my books – maybe I'll read the suspension scene from To Serve and Submit.

Shame on the NY Post

Wed, 13 Feb 2008 16:37:00 GMT

In case you haven't seen it, the NY Post ran an article about a man who suffered a mishap while in bondage at the Nutcracker pro-domination house in NYC. He was left alone while in bondage (a big no-no!) and his foot slipped out of his high heel shoe, causing him to choke on his collar that was tied to an eye-hook.

Okay, this is a newsworthy story - certainly questions of whether this happens often (no, or there would be stories every day about BDSM accidents), whether pro-domination is legal in NYC (yes it is) and whether there are safety standards to keep people from being harmed (definitely, including the standard practice that you're not supposed to leave someone alone when they're in bondage).

But the Post didn't ask those questions. Instead, their reporters managed to get the guy's real name and details of his life and outed him, along with contacting his wife to tell her what had happened.

And the Post's response to this invasion of privacy? According to the paper's spokesman, Howard Rubenstein: "The Post will happily name every adult caught in a dog collar."

Shame on the NY Post!

Here's the links to Conde Nast's Portfolio Media Blog which condemns the Post's practice.

And the latest Post article.

My sister Lisa, the author

Sun, 10 Feb 2008 15:14:34 GMT

My sister Lisa Wright DeGroodt is also an author. She's written several books in her Quest series, fantasy novels about an alternate land where good battles evil with the help of ordinary humans.

Lisa was just featured on the Leaky Cauldron’s weekly Pottercast. Leaky Cauldron is the official Harry Potter podcast and is one of the top podcasts on I-tunes. The episode is now available for downloading: http://pottercast.the-leaky-cauldron.org

She mentions how I sent her the first Harry Potter book and told her she had to read it because it was the same genre she was writing in. I'm just editing her 5th book now, Land Quest, and it's great. Charm Quest, the 4th book is going to be published in a couple of weeks. Her website is here. Check it out!

Busy, busy

Fri, 25 Jan 2008 16:38:19 GMT

If you're wondering why I don't update my journal very often, here's everything I did for NCSF in the last quarter of 2007...

Media Report – Sept-Dec 2007
by Susan Wright

I responded to 6 Incident Response requests – dealing with 2 individuals, a hotel trying to break a contract, and attacks on 2 clubs and a large event.

I did 6 interviews – Including with the Associated Press in Boston, The Bay Area Reporter, 1010 Wins in NYC, and The Colbert Report about Leather Weekend Street Fair in NYC. I agreed to alert the TCR producer about any large media incident we would be willing to discuss on-air with them.

I gave 3 media trainings via the phone, and arrangements were made for me to give 1 in-person media training for the board of a large BDSM organization in April 2008.

I responded to 11 inquires for information on BDSM statistics for: the Hawaii Department of Health, a PhD dissertation, a student documentary, and a clinical psychology student. Plus an inquiry about removing Sexual Sadism, Sexual Masochism, and Fetishism from the American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistic Manual IV-TR.

The Media Committee approved 6 press releases that I wrote which included information about what NCSF does for the community. I broadcast 1 Action Alert in support of Folsom Street Fair calling for letters in support of Miller Brewing for being a sponsor of the Fair.

Newsflash from the campaign trail

Fri, 21 Dec 2007 18:16:45 GMT

Mother Jones reports that Republican Presidential hopeful Mike Huckabee hates sadomasochists (as well as homosexuals, pedophiles and necrophiliacs). And environmentalists, pornographers and atheists.

Huckabee wrote in his 1998 children’s book, Kids Who Kill: Confronting Our Culture of Violence: "It is now difficult to keep track of the vast array of publicly endorsed and institutionally supported aberrations — from homosexuality and pedophilia to sadomasochism and necrophilia." He also wrote, "Abortion, environmentalism, AIDS, pornography, drug abuse, and homosexual activism have fragmented and polarized our communities." Huckabee also claims that "equality in the workplace has ironically worked against women in innumerable ways."

Since I'm a woman who happens to be a kinky, bi, atheist, environmentalist who helped file a lawsuit challenging obscenity law on the Internet... do you think he's talking about me? If so, where's my institutional support? Where's my public endorsement, god damn it?

GMSMA Leatherfest

Wed, 14 Nov 2007 17:13:41 GMT

I'll be at GMSMA's Leatherfest this weekend at the Gay and Lesbian Community Center from 3-9pm. I'll be giving a workshop on Sensationalized Sex from 4:15-5:30pm - it's a look at the past 10 years of NCSF's media activism, and the strategies we've developed to combat the way the media encourages the stigma about alt sex. I'm bringing copies of the Concerned Women for America's press release about My Viscious Valentine in 2002, when they declared the event hazardous to the health and reporters repeated their lies. I'll also bring the Missouri State Senate resolution that barred BDSM activities in the state - which NCSF got shelved. Plus much more!

I love GMSMA because my earliest activist mentors were members - Barry Douglas, Bruce Marcus and David Weinbaum. GMSMA was the first group I asked to join NCSF when I formed the organization. I knew if GMSMA didn't get involved, I didn't have much of an idea. But they did, and have been staunch supporters ever since.

I'm also one of only three women who are members of Gay Male SM Activists. I was given an honorary membership in the late 90s along with Lolita. Jo Arnone, Leather Pride Night's auctioneer for decades, is the other honorary member.

Speaking of LPN, while you're at GMSMA's Leatherfest, check out the Leather Pride Night Flea Market! This is the first year we're having our infamous Flea Market at Leatherfest instead of LPN in June. But since we moved to Splash! for the big auction, there's no space to produce the Flea Market at the same time. I love the Flea Market - you can't get better deals anywhere.

I hope to see you there!

Lies and damned lies

Wed, 07 Nov 2007 22:51:21 GMT

This was posted on the SM-act list yesterday: Miller Brewery Withdraws Support for Homosexual Festival; Catholic League Ends Boycott. This Lifesite article follows up their previous attack against Miller for sponsoring the Folsom Street Fair, a "sadomasochistic, anti-Christian homosexual parade which regularly includes full nudity and public sex acts."

I was bummed because I wrote and broadcast the NCSF Action Alert asking people to write supportive letters to Miller, thanking them for sponsoring Folsom Street Fair. I was cc'ed over 60 letters in return, and there's no telling how many were sent without cc'ing me - a great response from the BDSM-leather community.

So Lifesite says Miller caved to the Catholic League boycott, right? Wrong. When you go to the Catholic League's website, their statement ending the boycott quotes Miller apologizing for the events that took place at the fair in addition to the poster. Miller basically said "sorry you're offended," one of the most non-apologies that exists. This Catholic League boycott ended as all their others seem to, with a fizzle.

Miller is still sponsoring Folsom Street Fair. The Lifesite article was spin on top of spin. I guess they didn't want to end the boycott without shouting VICTORY! Reminds me of Bush's Victory banner in Iraq. And they're not the only ones. It boggles my mind how people can straight-up lie, yet justify to themselves that they're so righteous and moral. It must be how they keep their religious extremist foot-soldiers in fighting form for the next sex-negative rampage they decide to go on.

I know it when I see it

Thu, 11 Oct 2007 16:26:54 GMT

I wrote an article entitled "I Know It When I See It" that was just published in Skin Two magazine. Barbara Nitke's photos are also included in the issue.

Obscenity law is absurd – it's the only victimless crime that is judged according to subjective criteria. Sure, it's up to juries to judge intent when it comes to things like homicide or manslaughter, but at least in those cases there's a definitive reason (a dead body) to prosecute someone. But no one knows if they're breaking obscenity law because according to the Miller standard, the criteria for judging obscenity is completely subjective. You're judged according to "local community standards" and no one knows exactly what those standards are until a jury gets together and decides on each case.

What kind of law is that??? Community authorities are supposed to establish laws and regulations, not some random group of 12 people in a jury.

The reason I'm so concerned is because sadomasochism is on the short list of sexually explicit materials that the Department of Justice asks Attorney Generals to prosecute. Once again, the BDSM community is on the cutting edge, and we're the ones getting cut.

Stand Up and Be Counted

Wed, 19 Sep 2007 15:28:32 GMT

Participate in the Survey of Violence & Discrimination Against Sexual Minorities

September 19, 2007 – New York, NY - Susan Wright and Larry Iannotti would like to announce the launch of the second national Survey of Violence & Discrimination Against Sexual Minorities, being conducted in cooperation with the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom. This survey includes all of the questions asked on NCSF's ground-breaking 1998 Violence & Discrimination Against Sexual Minorities survey, and includes new questions on personal, business, and Internet discrimination experienced by BDSM-leather-fetish practitioners.

The link to the survey is on NCSF's website: www.ncsfreedom.org

Please take a minute to fill out this anonymous survey even if you have not been a victim of violence or discrimination. Demographic data and information about participation in a variety of BDSM-leather-fetish activities are also being gathered. This survey will be distributed for one year, and the results will be released in early 2009.

The results of this survey will be analyzed and compared to the 1998 survey, which found significant discrimination and violence occurring against BDSM-leather-fetish practitioners. The data may be used in court obscenity cases to prove that sexual minorities have been chilled on the Internet because of fear of prosecution. The survey also includes space for individuals to write about the discrimination they have faced, which will be helpful in illustrating the consequences of the negative stereotypes about BDSM-leather-fetish activities.

The survey is available on Survey Monkey (a secured survey hosting website that is used by the professional community) and can be accessed through the NCSF website: www.ncsfreedom.org You can contact surveybdsm@gmail.com to receive hard copies for your event or to distribute to your members.

Please help this community-wide effort by sending this announcement to your email list.

###

Larry Iannotti, LCSW, is a professional social scientist and practicing therapist getting his doctoral degree through the City University of NY. Susan Wright is the Media Spokesperson for NCSF, and is accredited as a research assistant affiliated with CUNY. For more information, please call Susan at 917-848-6544, or Larry at 212-465-1917.

Guy Art

Mon, 03 Sep 2007 16:36:48 GMT

The Dim Sum Yum party arranged by Boymeat was so much fun - our table was heavy on the testosterone with Nayland, Thor, and Kel. Lolita, Viviane, and the lovely Seraphim were also at our table.

Then Kel and I went to MoMA to see the Richard Serra retrospective with Robin. When we walked in and saw the 30 foot slab of metal on the floor, only 2 inches high, Robin immediately pegged it as "guy art." Kel loved it. I enjoyed the huge pieces you could walk inside - it's wild how the edges meld together perfectly despite the curves and recurves in the metal slabs. Kel saw them being moved out of Serra's studio in Greenpoint near our friend's loft. The enormous slabs filled the street which was closed down for several days as they maneuvered the heavy steel onto trucks.

It was fun seeing the museum collection again. I was finally able to put my masters to use and answered all of Kel's questions. It felt like I was seeing old friends, and I remembered far more about modern art than I thought I would.

Then we went to Spoonfed Too with Robin up on 134th Street in Harlem for fried chicken, cornbread and lemonade. Kel was in heaven, again. It was a real guy day.

Aftercare at The Floating World

Wed, 29 Aug 2007 14:43:47 GMT

The Floating World was great. I got to see lots of friends and my Sensationalized Sex workshop on advanced media strategies went really well. I think I'll offer it at other conferences.

One thing I noticed in the enormous playspace both nights was lots of aftercare. Maybe it was because it was such a big place where you could see from one side past all the play stations to the other end. I've never watched scenes from so far away before, but it was nice to be able to see lots of different things happening at once.

I realized I kept watching the scenes that were finished, during the aftercare. One guy covered his girl lovingly with a soft blanket and stroked her through it. Another helped his sub sit down (her high heels looked painful) and he stood next to her, murmuring to her for a long time as she put her forehead against him. I saw one woman leaning her entire body against her slave, comforting him. It was happening everywhere, for long periods of time.

I don't hear a lot about aftercare, but I think that the contact and connection that you make after a scene is important. Actually Kel and I don't do much aftercare - unless we've had an extreme or intense scene. After a good glowing spanking, I'm feeling great and all I need is an extra pat on the butt and a good kiss. But I do love aftercare, being hugged and touched after all my defenses have fallen, feeling all warm and floaty in his arms.

I'm curious what other people think of aftercare. Is it necessary to you or not? Does it depend on the scene or is it important after all power exchange? Is it different for slaves?

The Floating World

Thu, 23 Aug 2007 14:38:12 GMT

I'll be at The Floating World this weekend in New Jersey. They asked me to be their media spokesperson, but so far I haven't gotten any calls from the media. I'm hoping it stays quiet so Kel and I can have some fun. I'll be there Friday evening giving a workshop on Advanced Media Strategies, discussing incidents from the past and how NCSF dealt with each one. It's interesting because you get to see the behind-the-scenes decision making and details that most people don't know about each public incident.

On Saturday, we're going to play and have fun! See you there...

Where are you?

Tue, 24 Jul 2007 12:42:57 GMT

I've been getting some calls and emails asking where I am. Well, I'm nearing the end of writing the first draft of Confessions of a Demon. When I write a first draft, I sort of "go away" because I'm constantly thinking of the characters and the plot. I walk around the house in a daze, but there's also the underlying, constant tension from my deadline. Poor Kel - at least he's used to it by now.

I've written 10,000 words a week for the past 2 1/2 months, and I'm nearing exhaustion at the end here. My hands are killing me, and even my forearms and elbows are aching this time so I must be getting old. But I'm extremely happy with this book - it's exciting and plot-driven with a real hot relationship arc. I realized I should have been writing about modern-day New York all along. I know the city so well. And I know the underworld here in the city. So this will be one urban fantasy that has the urban in the fantasy. Plus demons, and you know how much fun they are.

AASECT conference

Thu, 28 Jun 2007 17:47:34 GMT

I spent spent a few days at the annual AASECT conference and had a great time, as usual. I mostly worked the NCSF table in the Exhibit Hall, talking to attendees about all of NCSF's projects that directly educate and serve the alt sex communities. I'm also a member of the AASECT advocacy committee, so I'm helping them organize their first advocacy projects. It's very exciting to be able to contribute to this wonderful group.

Here's the NCSF press release on it. Near the bottom, it also mentions my contribution to Sadomasochism: Powerful Pleasures, which I'm very proud of.

NCSF and ITCR Participate in AASECT's 2007 Annual Conference

National Coalition for Sexual Freedom and The Institute for 21st Century Relationships: The Foundation of NCSF participated in the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists' 2007 annual conference, The Soul of Sexuality, held in Charlotte, NC, from June 20-24th. AASECT is the premier North American training and credentialing organization for sexual health professionals and sex therapists. Supporting Memberships extend to all individuals who share an interest in promoting understanding of human sexuality and healthy sexual behavior (www.aasect.org).

A standing-room-only crowd attended "Big(ger) Love: Boomers and Sexually Open Relationships," by James Fleckenstein, President and CEO of ITCR: The Foundation of NCSF, and Carol Morotti-Meeker MS, MLSP. This informative presentation gave attendees a clearer understanding of the history of sexually open relationships, how these relationships work, past research validating their suitability, and techniques for serving clients who are practicing, or interested in exploring them.

At the NCSF table in the Exhibit Hall, therapists and counselors signed up for the Kink Aware Professionals list (www.ncsfreedom.org/kap/index.htm). This online resource provides referrals to psychotherapeutic, medical, and legal professionals who are knowledgeable about and sensitive to diverse expressions of sexuality. The positive response came from sex educators, counselors, therapists, psychologists and registered nurses. A number of professionals who are already on the KAP list commented that they get referrals from this free service, and they're glad to serve members of the BDSM, swing and polyamory communities.

The AASECT conference makes available academic research and publications that are vital to changing the perception of alternative sexuality. NCSF and ITCR encourage your support for two books that were published in the last year: "America's War on Sex" and "Sadomasochism: Powerful Pleasures."

Marty Klein, PhD, received AASECT's Book Award for "America's War on Sex," with foreword by Nadine Strossen, President of the ACLU, published by Praeger Publishers, 2006 (www.AmericasWarOnSex.com). From the book jacket:

"With hundreds of examples ripped from today's headlines, Dr. Klein names names, challenges political hypocrisy, and shows the financial connections between government and conservative religious groups that are systematically taking away your rights. Savagely funny, brutally honest, Dr. Klein isn't shy about it."

"Sadomasochism: Powerful Pleasures" edited by AASECT board member Peggy J. Kleinplatz, PhD, and Charles Moser, PhD, MD, was co-published simultaneously by Haworth Press and the Journal of Homosexuality, Volume 50, Numbers 2/3 2006 (www.haworthpress.com/store/product.asp?sku=5794). The 15 articles include "Discrimination of SM-Identified Individuals" by Susan Wright, MA, spokesperson for NCSF, which details the history of discrimination against SM practitioners since the 1970s, including attacks by the American religious right and sex-negative feminists.

In his review of "Sadomasochism: Powerful Pleasures," the late Eric Rofes, PhD, stated:

"Powerful and important… Moves sadomasochism from the suspect fringe to center stage for our academic and clinical consideration. By bringing together these pioneering authors and insightful pieces, the editors have done a tremendous service to the filed of sex research and to the lives of those who enjoy SM. Rarely have I seen a book that so powerfully redefined an entire field of sexual inquiry so swiftly and in so thorough a manner."

NCSF and ITCR: The Foundation of NCSF are committed to educating professionals and health service providers about alternative sexual expression, and will continue to support AASECT.

###

A joint Project of NCSF and ITCR: The Foundation of NCSF

The National Coalition for Sexual Freedom is a national organization committed to creating a political, legal, and social environment in the United States that advances equal rights of consenting adults who practice forms of alternative sexual expression. NCSF is primarily focused on the rights of consenting adults in the SM-leather-fetish, swing, and polyamory communities, who often face discrimination because of their sexual expression.

National Coalition for Sexual Freedom
822 Guilford Avenue, Box 127
Baltimore, MD 21202-3707
917-848-6544
media@ncsfreedom.org
www.ncsfreedom.org

NCSF Action Alert

Wed, 06 Jun 2007 15:58:30 GMT

Support the Palmer House Hilton, Host Hotel for IML

Please write a short note of support for the Palmer House Hilton, host hotel for International Mr. Leather, thanking them for not discriminating against any guests or groups based on their sexual orientation. The anti-gay group, Americans For Truth, posted an action alert calling for people to protest the "homosexual orgies" that take place at the "sadistic sexual perversion-fest known as International Mr. Leather." AFT website: http://tinyurl.com/3atcsg

The Palmer House Hilton has been a staunch supporter of the Fair Accommodations Act in working with alternative lifestyle groups, particularly IML. Please email your note of appreciation to:

Stephen Bollenback, CEO
Hilton Hotels Corporation
stephen_bollenbach@hilton.com

Trina Owens
Hilton Hotels Corporation
trina_owens@hilton.com

Peter Lynn, General Manager
Palmer House Hilton
peter_lynn@hilton.com

###

The National Coalition for Sexual Freedom is a national organization committed to creating a political, legal, and social environment in the United States that advances equal rights of consenting adults who practice forms of alternative sexual expression. NCSF is primarily focused on the rights of consenting adults in the SM-leather-fetish, swing, and polyamory communities, who often face discrimination because of their sexual expression.

National Coalition for Sexual Freedom
822 Guilford Avenue, Box 127
Baltimore, MD 21202-3707
917-848-6544
media@ncsfreedom.org
www.ncsfreedom.org

Close your eyes and think of America

Tue, 15 May 2007 13:09:47 GMT

I am Kelly

Thu, 03 May 2007 15:22:03 GMT

In my dream last night I was wearing Kelly's body. I was still me, but I had his body on. I was fascinated by how big and bulky I felt as I walked around, taking up a lot more space than I usually do, seeing things from a higher viewpoint than usual. I stared into the mirror examining my stubbled face and feeling my curly hair which was so different from my own.

Then I realized I had a penis! What was I doing wasting my time when I had a penis? I had to try it out and masturbate. I was just starting to touch myself when Kelly came home. He was shocked to see me wearing his body. I was bummed that I wouldn't be able to try out his penis now that he was home.

My question is: if you have sex with yourself does that make you gay, or is it technically considered to be masturbation?

Tree snuff

Wed, 25 Apr 2007 14:49:34 GMT

The trees are fucking all over the city. They blow open their pollen pods and spray their seed everywhere so it floats through the cracks of my house and up my nose. The trees are trying to kill me! While they're fucking! What is this - a tree snuff scene? I didn't consent to this...

Rachel Kramer Bussel's Blog Tour

Fri, 20 Apr 2007 12:26:46 GMT

Today's my day on Rachael Kramer Bussel's virtual blog tour. I really enjoyed HE'S ON TOP, the anthology Rachael edited with 16 erotic stories about male dominance and female submission, just published by Cleis Press.

Two of the stories were "Confession" by Gwen Masters and "The Sun is an Ordinary Star" by Shanna Germain. I was touched by both because they're so real - as well as steaming hot! In "Confession," a woman realizes after 20 years of marriage that she doesn't love her husband, yet she has sex with him. The next day she confesses to her priest - "I slept with someone I don't love." As in any relationship, love depends on honesty and vulnerability, and revealing the truth about ourselves that we don't want to face is sometimes the only way to save a marriage.

In "The Sun is an Ordinary Star," a dominant man deeply loves his wife who is ill with cancer, and he hates himself for wanting to play roughly with her the way they used to. He treats her too tenderly, it seems for her. I know exactly how that feels, to be sick and hardly stand to be touched, yet still crave the intensity and connection that only a great scene can give you.

Finally, Rachel's story "Late for a Spanking" seemed at first like a light-hearted punishment romp when a sassy sub is late for a play date. But this story isn't about a couple in love, but a polyamorous play relationship. The dom in the story is in love with his other sub, and he has restrictions on what he can do with the his spankee - he can't touch her genitals or have vanilla sex with her. He can only spank her, and that is something he both appreciates and accepts, yet he also has to fight his own desire for her.

Kel and I have had various agreements over the years - and I've always said that whatever works for you and your partner is what's right. Yet vanilla folks just can't seem to wrap their head about the fact that each poly arrangement is unique and the only limits are the ones everyone agrees to.

Real people having really hot sex. That's my kind of book. Check it out! And check out the other bloggers on Rachel's blog tour. You won't be sorry.

Confessions of a Demon

Mon, 16 Apr 2007 14:42:02 GMT

I sold two more novels to Roc/Penguin Group!

CONFESSIONS OF A DEMON is an erotic urban fantasy set in NYC. Allay, a human/demon hybrid, encounters the oldest demon in the world who's spent thousands of years stalking the worst elements of the demon subculture. Sparks fly and deep intrigues are brewing.

DEMON WARS is a stand-alone novel that takes place in the same universe. Hope, Allay's off-spring, must learn to live in the demon subculture that's been thrown into turmoil while falling in love with the wounded hero.

The urban fantasy/paranormal romance categories are so HOT and right for me. The first one will be out late next year.

Dear Abby...

Mon, 02 Apr 2007 13:36:16 GMT

I should be writing about a great scene I just had, but it never happened. I've been teasing this guy for 9 years - that's the last time I let him have his way with my feet. I'd been fantasizing about having another scene with him when suddenly he suggested a trade - he gets my feet and Kel gets to spank his gorgeous girl. Yeah, now that's what I'm talking about! Sounds like plenty of fun. We figured we could get together at the Bacchus party last week.

But after proposing his perfect little plan, he disappeared. We emailed to make the arrangements for the party, and got nothing. We sent a follow-up email, and still nothing. Boo-hoo! What would you do if someone begged you for a scene for years, and then blew you off without a word?

signed,
This Little Piggy

Houseplants of Gor

Sat, 17 Mar 2007 18:43:52 GMT

The spider plant cringed as its owner brought forth the watering can. "I am a spider plant!" it cried indignantly. "How dare you water me before my time! Guards!" it called. "Guards!"

Borin, its owner, placed the watering can on the table and looked at it. "You will be watered," he said.

"You do not dare to water me!" laughed the plant.

"You will be watered," said Borin.

"Do not water me!" wept the plant.

"You will be watered," said Borin.

I watched this exchange. Truly, I believed the plant would be watered. It was plant, and on Gor it had no rights. Perhaps on Earth, in its permissive society, which distorts the true roles of all beings, which forces both plant and waterer to go unhappy and constrained, which forbids the fulfillment of owner and houseplant, such might not happen. Perhaps there, it would not be watered. But it was on Gor now, and would undoubtedly feel its true place, that of houseplant. It was plant. It would be watered at will. Such is the way with plants.

Borin picked up the watering can, and muchly watered the plant. The plant cried out. "No, Master! Do not water me!" The master continued to water the plant. "Please, Master," begged the plant, "do not water me!" The master continued to water the plant. It was plant. It could be watered at will.

The plant sobbed muchly as Borin laid down the watering can. It was not pleased. Too, it was wet. But this did not matter. It was plant.

"You have been well watered," said Borin.

"Yes," said the plant, "I have been well watered." Of course, it could be watered by its master at will.

"I have watered you well," said Borin.

"Yes, master," said the plant. "You have watered your plant well. I am plant, and as such I should be watered by my master."

The cactus plant next to the spider plant shuddered. It attempted to cover its small form with its small arms and small needles. "I am plant," it said wonderingly. "I am of Earth, but for the first time, I feel myself truly plantlike. On Earth, I was able to control my watering. I often scorned those who would water me. But they were weak, and did not see my scorn for what it was, the weak attempt of a small plant to protect itself. Not one of the weak Earth waterers would dare to water a plant if it did not wish it. But on Gor," it shuddered, "on Gor it is different. Here, those who wish to water will water their plants as they wish. But strangely, I feel myself most plantlike when I am at the mercy of a strong Gorean master, who may water me as he pleases."

"I will now water you," said Borin, the cactus's Gorean master.

The cactus did not resist being watered. Perhaps it was realizing that such watering was its master's to control. Too, perhaps it knew that this master was far superior to those of Earth, who would not water it if it did not wish to be watered.

The cactus's watering had been finished. The spider plant looked at it.

"I have been well watered," it said.

"I, too, have been well watered," said the cactus.

"My master has watered me well," said the spider plant.

"My master, too, has watered me well," said the cactus.

"I am to be placed in a hanging basket on the porch," said the spider plant.

"I, too, am to be placed in a hanging basket on the porch," said the cactus.

"I wish you well," said the spider plant.

"I, too, wish you well," said the cactus.

"Tal," said the spider plant.

"Tal, too," said the cactus.

I did not think that the spider plant would object to being watered by its master again. For it realized that it was plant, and that here, unlike on Earth, it was likely to be owned and watered by many masters.

***
<a href=">http://www.rdrop.com/~/wyvern/data/houseplants.html">By Elle, who has read far too many Gor books and taken far too many finals to be allowed to run rampant on a computer</a>

the latest joust is about to begin

Thu, 08 Mar 2007 16:50:47 GMT

Today is the Kink.com public hearing in San Francisco over the historic Armory in the Mission District. The use of the Armory as a fetish film production site is legal according to the zoning regulations. So the only problem is a few neighbors who think porn and BDSM "degrades women" and is "violence". For some reason fetish filmmakers are scarier to them than the drug paraphernalia that used to litter the street.

Since Kink.com was located only 9 blocks away for years without anyone knowing they were there, it's hard to take their protests seriously. Especially since owner Peter Acworth is sinking tons of money into the Armory to restore it, cleaning and lighting up the exterior. No other use is acceptable because of the lack of windows and the historical protection which means much of it can't be altered.

I created an Action Alert for NCSF to get supporters to the public hearing, but too many people emailed back that they're afraid they'll be outed by the tv cameras because of the media brouhaha. But Steve Bower agreed to go for Society of Janus, an NCSF Coalition Partner, and Demetri is going to be there on behalf of Folsom Street Fair, and both will speak in support of Kink.com.

Then I found out late Tuesday afternoon that statements of support can be submitted to be read into the public record at the planning commission hearing. So I got busy contacting people in SF to write statements of support, and I even helped write a couple of them. I also sent a statement on behalf of NCSF.

I called the SF Planning Commission yesterday to make sure they got my statement and they told me they had received a lot of statements and that the majority were supportive of Kink.com. Yah! The very nice vanilla woman at the Planning Commission got very heated in her defense of Kink.com, saying, "I toured the Armory and I think it's the best use we could find for that building. Nobody can see in! None of those people are going to bother the kids in the neighborhood."

You said it, sister! Let's see if common sense is stronger than senseless prejudice this time.

great sex

Thu, 01 Mar 2007 15:47:47 GMT

Kel and I went to a party at Bacchus produced by TabuLifestyle.com on Saturday. We haven't gone out for months; just too busy and not in the mood. Soon after we arrived, Kel pointed out the goth couple with the girl with the scales of justice tattooed on her thigh. We had talked to them at the Halloween party. Her name is Candy-Coating, and she has a nice spicy core under that sweet surface.

Kel whispered, "He's into you," and I smiled and flirted with her tall, raven-haired boyfriend. I love to tease, that's my scene, just ask Boymeat.

Only this time, I was in the zone and went for it. So much fun! Kel couldn't believe my sudden switch in direction. He's always protective of me even though I have no trouble telling guys "no." But that's also my scene – the rescued princess. I think it threw Kel for a bit of a loop, but he had fun with the delectable Candy-Coating.

Since then, I've been thinking about Peggy Kleinplatz's article on great sex - "Building Blocks Toward Optimal Sexuality" published in January in the Family Journal: Counseling and Therapy for Couples and Families. I did an interview with her and writing-partner Dana, and she sent the pdf last week.

They interviewed lots of people in the BDSM community as well as retired people who feel they have "great sex". The retired folk were recruited from vanilla organizations but almost invariably they considered themselves kinky or nonmonogamous in some way. What a co-inky-dink!

As I've always thought, women's magazines with their sex tips, techniques and averages are worse than useless. The key to great sex is being able to be fully present, to be uninhibited and experience each moment fully. Intimacy and trust are also key, which may be why I felt so comfortable with my boy-toy – they were familiar to me, and very relaxed together. For the past decade, when put in that situation, I would go for the girl and not do much of anything with the guy. I guess Kel fulfills my man-needs more than enough, but this sure was savory. Maybe we'll see them again the next time we're at Bacchus.